Observing

Observing:

 I've learned over the years the saying, "you can't put your foot in your mouth, if you don't open your mouth" is some of the best advice in the world for a couple of reasons. First is an obvious reason you can't say something stupid if you don't say anything at all(which never works if you've had a couple drinks). In my case doing this helps me to sound less like a knuckle dragger.

The second reason is that it can make you be quiet during the conversation and listen rather then thinking about what we are going to say next. On top of that what we were going to say next is probably something about ourselves because we as humans love talking about our own world. I feel like an idiot every time I catch myself doing that.

I found it helpful in a conversation to ask a question when the other person is done talking. I ask a question pertaining to what they just said or ask a question about their family, job and life. This helps to stop from interjecting something about myself into the conversation. This helps to build a connection and relationship with someone by showing interest in their world. On top of building a positive relationship you actually get time to listen to what they are saying.

The third reason is that it allows you to observe not just what they are saying with their words. You can tell a lot from a person in a conservation by how they are acting, how they are standing, what direction they are facing, where they are looking when they are talking to you, if they're fidgeting, where their hands are and how they move when you move. There are simple body language cues you can pick up on along with proxemics(the distance between you and another person) that can tell you more about their motives in the conversation then the actual words coming out of their mouth.

Lastly, listening and observing allows you to learn. Especially in movement,  I'm a firm believer in that there are no(or very few) right and wrong techniques for movement but only more efficient and less efficient. It's human nature to think the way we were first taught is always the right way or the best way. Which it's not always the case. In all aspects of life listening and observing we learn and by learning new things we evolve which can help us grow and get better. Being open to other ideas and by keeping your mouth closed when someone presents another point might just actually help you out.